Satisfaction

Hope deferred makes the heart sick but when the desire is fulfilled it is a tree of life.Prov13:12

I can relate to having a sick heart. Being a divorcee the desire for a marriage that works still abides, however I know that my answer lies in Christ. I have seen many nice faces but as I trust the Lord He shows me the hearts.

I was married to an aggressive man and my father was an angry man, however, I had a grandfather who was a step-grandfather whom I loved. His name was Cecil. He was an unassuming man, a butcher by trade who also raised his own cattle. I remember his chestnut horse and his dog Rover. This man knew how to love, he didn't make a loud noise about it but I knew I was loved. He would walk down the street with my hand in his and we would look at the shop windows together. What I loved most about Cecil was the fact that he made me feel loved.

I lost Cecil when I was 5 or 6. I actually knew I would lose him as he went away to hospital and never returned. When he was packing to leave I pleaded with him not to go and told him 'no! you won't come back'.

I realise that the man the comes into my world will be a Cecil, as when a woman is loved she doesn't need to be lorded over she wants to please.

I have spent 6 years alone and although it has been frustrating I am so grateful, I have learned to discern the hearts of men, control my own heart and wait patiently for my Lord. His ways are best. Amen!