Marriage and Believers Married to Unbelievers

I (Paul) command the married- not I, but the Lord- a wife is not to leave her husband. But if she does leave, she must remain single or be reconciled to her husband- and a husband is not to leave his wife. But I (not the Lord) say to the rest: if any brother has an unbelieving wife and she is willing to live with him, he must not leave her. Also, if any woman has an unbelieving husband and he is willing to live with her, she must not leave her husband. For the unbelieving husband is set apart for God by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is set apart for God by the husband. Otherwise your children would be corrupt, but now are set apart for God. But if the unbeliever leaves, let him leave. A brother or sister is not bound in such cases.

We seek easy answers to difficult situations in marriage and the desire to leave one's spouse is the solution. Paul is reminding us that to leave your spouse for a reason apart from infidelity, and although he does not mention it-infidelity- this is a given, you must remain single. Infidelity by a spouse frees the other party to marry again, if they so choose. 

Choosing to leave your spouse may seem the easy answer but what you should now do is spend time with the Lord to change in you what needs to be changed, strengthen what needs to be strengthen, so that you will be wiser and a better vessel than before. To assume that all the problems belong to your spouse is foolishness indeed, always allow God to deal with your heart.

Unfortunately most make the assumption, it's not me, and race off into a new relationship with the same broken vessel or set of values and set themselves up for another failure.

In modern churches we rarely seeing a leaving spouse willing to remain single. The desire for a marriage that works drives them to try again.

In the above scripture as Christianity came into areas some spouses were remaining unbelieving. The believer was encouraged to stay married, and so sanctify the family through their believing. This is good and the believing spouse can be a blessing if they so choose and are not being abused for their beliefs. Abuse is never good and should not be tolerated.

Last night I watched a programme that showed a young girl who was taken at 13 from Australia to be wed to a relative in Syria. Her mother had been beaten for 20 years and when the daughter, who had escaped, was asked what she thought of her mother for allowing her to be taken, the girl replied: " I understand that when you have been beaten for 20 years you submit, you change."

Ther are many beaten and abused women in the world and this is not good. Abusive men need to understand that what they are doing is wrong. A change is coming.